7 Things You Can Say To Harm A Child

I have to admit that of late I have left the social media giant of Facebook to latch onto the next wave of sharing every detail of my life. Twitter is a social networking service that gives you 140 words to say whatever you want. The best thing I have found out about Twitter is the connections that you can make to other members of the church, and met others from the “Christian” community. Adam Faughn posted a link to his blog the other day on Twitter and I thought I would share its contents.

What can we say that will harm a child?

1. “You’ll never be able to…” That might be true in some cases, but a small child doesn’t need to hear it. Let a child experiment and try new things. If a child fails, he or she can learn from that failure. But by saying that they’ll never be able to do something, you are keeping them from striving for improvement.

2. “You’re stupid!” (dumb, or irritating, or annoying, etc.) If we tell a child one of these horrible characteristics, sooner or later (and probably sooner) the child will believe it. If we tell a child he’s stupid, we shouldn’t expect him to do well in school. If we tell a child he/she is annoying, we shouldn’t be surprised when he/she acts out.

3. “You’re in the way.” There are times to say this, and there are times to avoid it like the plague. At “normal” times, a child is NOT in the way!

4. “Meet our accident.” Parents often talk about an unplanned child as an “accident.” What does the child think about that? The last time I checked, the Bible said that children (all children) are an heritage from the Lord!

5. “Can’t you do any better than that?” Maybe the child can’t, but there is a different way to say it! “That’s a good job, honey, but daddy’s going to help you do even better!”

6. For preteens: “Who’s your boyfriend/girlfriend?” This is one I have trouble avoiding, but we need to stop trying to pair off small children. Let the child have a childhood and stop trying to force them into some type of relationship. Even by kidding around about it, these words make it seem as though pairing up is just what you do.

7. Nothing. When a child asks a question or asks you to look at something, by all means, respond. Even if you say, “Daddy will in just a second, dear,” you have at least acknowledged the presence and request of the child. Don’t just let a child’s question “hang” out there. Over time, the child will learn just to say nothing to you.

Adam has a great point in this list. Sometimes, we can become wrapped up in ourselves and forget the needs of the children that are around us. We must realize the impact that your words have on children, and understand the influence and direction that they can place in their life. ~Kyle
Reference-http://faughnfamilyof4.wordpress.com/2009/11/04/7-things-you-can-say-to-harm-a-child/